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Số người truy cập cùng lúc nhiều nhất là 14 người, vào ngày Sun Nov 11, 2012 1:18 am

The students should restrict to the use of social networks

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The students should restrict to the use of social networks

Bài gửi  caoxuanlien on Wed Dec 07, 2011 10:16 pm

Hello! I send the outline of my essay for everyone to give comments. Please share me your ideas to make this outline better. Thanks in advance! ^^
OUTLINE
I. Instruction
Thesis statement: In my viewpoint, students should restrict to the use of social network because of many negative influences such as consuming their time, making them addicts and distracting their study.
II. Body
Paragraph 1: Participating in the social network consumes a lot of students’ time.
- Spending 3 to 4 hours per day to log in their private pages
- Cannot control their time
- No time for the other activities
Paragraph 2: Students are easily become addicted due to overusing the social network.
- Cannot live without the social networks
- Feel uncomfortable and anxious
- Symptoms: forgetting time, ignoring meals and sleep, suffering the tension or anger, etc.
Paragraph 3: The students’ study will be distracted considerably.
- Cannot focus on the lesson in class
- The concentration on study is interrupted
- Little time for doing homework, going to the library, reviewing
III. Refutation
Many people may argue that the social network increase the interaction among the members by allowing them to share information, emotion as well as images freely. In fact, this benefit of the social network is undeniable; however, everything has both positive and negative sides.
IV. Conclusion

caoxuanlien

Tổng số bài gửi : 5
Join date : 13/11/2011

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Re: The students should restrict to the use of social networks

Bài gửi  quang thi nhu thien on Fri Dec 09, 2011 7:18 pm

Very Happy
Hi Lien!
A good outline!Regard as content,it's good,but there are some minor errors in your word uses shown here:
+instruction-->introduction
+note that"addict" is a person who is unable to stop doing something harmful to him/her
actually,we rarely say:make them addicts.you can refer to" turn them into addicts"/make them addicted
+no "to" after restrict;except for restrict sth to sth
+increase-->increases
Anyway, so far so good!!!

quang thi nhu thien

Tổng số bài gửi : 5
Join date : 09/12/2011

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Re: The students should restrict to the use of social networks

Bài gửi  tranthikimnhung on Mon Dec 12, 2011 10:20 am

A good outline!
The supporting ideas are relevant.

tranthikimnhung

Tổng số bài gửi : 5
Join date : 17/11/2011
Age : 26
Đến từ : hue

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Re: The students should restrict to the use of social networks

Bài gửi  vuihoang on Mon Dec 12, 2011 5:47 pm

your outline is clear. Im waiting for your essay .

vuihoang

Tổng số bài gửi : 5
Join date : 02/11/2011
Age : 25
Đến từ : LOP ANHSPK6D (MON VIET 5-N1)

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Re: The students should restrict to the use of social networks

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